Horoscopes

CAPRICORN – December 22-January 19
As we all ring in the New Year together, you can also celebrate another year of growing older! Lucky You! 2010 is set to be your year to shine, a “come back” you might say. Forget about your New Year’s resolutions…I think the Mayans might be onto something, and if so, we only have 2 good years left…so go on…smoke your laughin lettuce, eat till it hurts, and have a little rum in your egg nog!
CELEBRITY CAPRICORN: Daffy Duck
IDEAL JOB: Cactus Thorn Picker outer

These Horoscopes are meant to be fun and enjoyed. They should not be taken too seriously. SAGITTARIUS – November 22-December 21 Happy Birthday and Merry Xmas! You have a lot to celebrate this year. This month will be a strange one for you…the smell of Evergreen trees has an intense

These Horoscopes are meant to be fun and enjoyed. They should not be taken too seriously. SCORPIO – October 23-November 21 Woop! Woop! It’s your Birthday! The phrase “having your cake and eating it too” has always troubled you…Today, cakes all have a “best before” date on them, so if

VIRGO – August 23-September 22
This will be a VERY happy 2 months for you. After all, it is your birthday! And you know what they’ve been saying about that for a thousand of years, don’t you? “Happy Good! Me like Happy!” Cartwheels, hand stands, head stands, single arm press ups, sit ups, and sand castles the shape of gymnasiums are well starred. Take note, perhaps you could use a little exercise?
CELEBRITY VIRGO: Ione Skye
PROS: Smart /CONS: Perfectionist

LIBRA – September 23-October 22
“Geronimo!”, “Yahooooooo!” but NOT “Weee!” are the best ways to show extreme enjoyment such as when catching that big fish, canopying across the jungle, or jumping suddenly into water. This month your destiny has a lisp and is determined to say MISSISSIPPI…don’t worry about it…make yourself a coffee, sit down and read the internet, hell…its what you do everyday right? While you’re at it, make yourself a birthday cake, the chocolate and fattening kind cause no one celebrates birthdays with gusto after sweet 16!
CELEBRITY LIBRA: Shaun Cassidy
PROS: Harmonious /CONS: Procrastinator